$1,000,000,000,000
Who's It Good For?
Andrew Weitsman
Issue date: 2/19/09 Section: Entertainment
Once again, Washington, DC is attempting to gain seats in Congress. Once again, the motion has passed through a committee, and will be put to a vote. Once again, such a move has been called "Unconstitutional." And once again, it will probably fail. Why? Because then they'd have to change the license plates.
In case you weren't aware, DC license plates read "Taxation without representation."
DC itself sits squarely between Maryland and Virginia, and depending on who you ask, it is a city in either of them. There is a mayor. There is a city council (on which former mayor and Balgojevich Award-Winner for Incompetence Marion Berry still serves). There is a school district, a public transportation system, and so on. And there's also a ton of foreign embassies, the Capital and the White House. And yet, DC has no representation in the national government.
North Dakota has Senate and House seats, and only six people live in the entire state! DC has over one million.
Regardless of whether DC gets the seats and can be taxed with representation or not, it might come too late. For the bailout, I mean. But, imagining a more perfect world, let's imagine what the District would use its bailout money for:
-Transportation: The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority has deemed it necessary to fire a double-digit percentage of its employees, do away with paper transfers (that save people money when changing buses but cost them over $4 million, apparently), and raise ticket costs by about 100% during rush hour.
So far, the only results are more late-running trains due to stalls on the line, dirtier train cars, and more frequent "track maintenance" at busy times on some of the most frequently used lines. The Metro keeps telling people that they need more money to make it better and run on time, so give it to them! I'm tired of shelling out $5 to get halfway across town to my dentist.
-Museums: Sure, most of the museums and educational areas in DC are free, like the Smithsonian, the National Portrait Gallery, and the zoo, but the really cool ones charge you a boatload. I, for one, would like to pretend to be a Cold Warrior at the Spy Museum or get my picture taken with Wax Morgan Freeman at Madame Tussaud's without worrying about an entry fee. That lousy "Museum of Crime and Punishment" can keep on charging, though.
In case you weren't aware, DC license plates read "Taxation without representation."
DC itself sits squarely between Maryland and Virginia, and depending on who you ask, it is a city in either of them. There is a mayor. There is a city council (on which former mayor and Balgojevich Award-Winner for Incompetence Marion Berry still serves). There is a school district, a public transportation system, and so on. And there's also a ton of foreign embassies, the Capital and the White House. And yet, DC has no representation in the national government.
North Dakota has Senate and House seats, and only six people live in the entire state! DC has over one million.
Regardless of whether DC gets the seats and can be taxed with representation or not, it might come too late. For the bailout, I mean. But, imagining a more perfect world, let's imagine what the District would use its bailout money for:
-Transportation: The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority has deemed it necessary to fire a double-digit percentage of its employees, do away with paper transfers (that save people money when changing buses but cost them over $4 million, apparently), and raise ticket costs by about 100% during rush hour.
So far, the only results are more late-running trains due to stalls on the line, dirtier train cars, and more frequent "track maintenance" at busy times on some of the most frequently used lines. The Metro keeps telling people that they need more money to make it better and run on time, so give it to them! I'm tired of shelling out $5 to get halfway across town to my dentist.
-Museums: Sure, most of the museums and educational areas in DC are free, like the Smithsonian, the National Portrait Gallery, and the zoo, but the really cool ones charge you a boatload. I, for one, would like to pretend to be a Cold Warrior at the Spy Museum or get my picture taken with Wax Morgan Freeman at Madame Tussaud's without worrying about an entry fee. That lousy "Museum of Crime and Punishment" can keep on charging, though.
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